My Aha Moment

repeatedly doing, originally uploaded by emdot.

Holy shit I just figured this out. It's fairly simple but also very big for me in my life.

Here goes.

There are lots of people who hate to work out. Hate it. Even Jillian Michaels, my current beatings-beating-and-more-beatings virtual dream coach, even she hates working out.

I don't get that. Me? I LOVE working out. I love running and walking and hiking and spinning and lifting weights and yoga and classes and the whole gamut. Love it. And, I have to confess, I have complete disdain for workouts that don't really work you out. I mean c'mon people: break a sweat! Push yourselves. Get dirty. Get out of breath. Don't give me this little Curves for-women type of weight machines. Puh-lease.

No. Work out. Work out hard and love every moment of it. Choose to love every moment of it.

And for those people who don't like to work out but who do it every day... that is some kind of determination and commitment. And I don't relate to it, but I seriously admire your ability to do something that you hate.

Okay. That was the background story. Where I'm coming from.

So, what do I hate? I HATE COOKING. I hate cooking; I hate shopping; I hate meal planning; I hate packing my lunch; I hate figuring out what I'm going to have for breakfast. And dinner? Seriously: too much pressure. Please don't make me think. I hate figuring it OUT, much less cooking. I mean cooking? Why don't you just poke hot rusty pokers into my eyes.

My attitude is typically, you cook and I'll do the dishes (because I love doing the dishes). And if you don't like to cook -- yea! -- we get to go out! My kinda meal preparation.

But when you are getting healthy, losing weight, creating a new lifestyle... it doesn't really work that way.

Eating out is the equivalent of working out at curves. Having someone else prepare food for you is kinda like doing the mamby-pamby don't break a sweat workouts.

And that was my aha moment. I don't like to cook, but I'm going to have to suck it up and do it anyway because this is about me reaching my goals, turning things around, and accomplishing what really matters in my life.

So you guys who don't like to work out but do it anyway? I salute you. And I am about to join your ranks. I will plan my meals. I will go grocery shopping. I will cook dinner. I will pack my lunch. And you know what? I'm going to choose to love it because this is what I want in my life. And what I want in my life, for my life, squarely trumps my "food, meh" attitude.

overheard (aka guess you had to be there)

I'm pretty sure that my twitter super fave, Soupy Sales, is not the real Soupy Sales. Could the real Soupy Sales who is well over eighty and supposedly ailing really have such a wonderfully crafted twitter background and several other octegenarian twitter pals? I like to think that is true... but...

Me: Hee! Listen to Soupy on Twitter... (dons Soupy-twitter voice and reads aloud).

Steve: Poor fake Soupy.

overheard

Me: I've never been to Venice. I've never been to Italy. Don't you feel sorry for me?
Steve: No.
Me: No? Not even pity?
Steve: I didn't say that. I pity the fool.

... maybe you had to be there ...

Today's Post: Revisit 2004: Henry Miller

LIFORN, originally uploaded by emdot.

To keep the miracle alive, to live always in the miracle, to make the miracle more and more miraculous, to swear allegiance to nothing, but live only miraculously, think only miraculously.

— Henry Miller

Originally posted August 18, 2004

Aside: August 18, I believe is one of the best birthday's around. It is the birthday of Austin, Jijnes, Remington, and Oliver.

Today's Post: Revisit 2004: About Los Osos

hello you beautiful world, originally uploaded by emdot.

"I really have no idea how I ever got to work at 8 or 8:30 in the past. These days I'm lucky to get in before Noon. Right. Like that happens. But I LOVE working in LO. Love it. It is so pretty here.

"I wonder if it is a pretty not available at first glance? But this is my home town so I know its glances, its movements, its nuances. I know where to look to see the beauty. God -- everywhere. But if you are the sort that equates nice towns with similar homes (aka tracts) and sidewalks and stoplights and groomed anything, this is not the town for you.

"LO is sandy. And a little weatherbeaten. Its trees are scraggly and you won't be hard pressed to find a car on blocks in someone's yard. But there is the bay sitting at your feet and the sand spit stretching out and the pacific holding it all together. There is the smell of ocean mist and and a slight breeze. The sky is robin's egg and the cypress trees reach up to meet it while the pigmy oaks stay low like little gnomes gathering together. The people are Down To Earth (exclamation point) and quite an honest, sincere bunch. There's hiking and mountain biking and surfing and sand boarding. People go for walks every single evening -- post-dinner walks are a given here. There are two bars (Sweet Springs, aka Meat Swings and The Merry Maker, aka The Marraige Breaker). Excellent thai. And a kickass locals cafe where you will run into damn near anyone you care about and/or see their kids (and when did the kids grow up?)."

Originally posted August 19, 2004

wednesday plays dress up with saturday's clothing

cactus flower, originally uploaded by emdot.

This morning, instead of following my work-morning schedule I have been so dutiful about, I threw caution to the wind and had a Saturday Morning instead. I drank two deliciously dark and strong cups of coffee with just the right amount of cream and I caught up on some Internet reading (o newspaper, someday we will reunite).

Person I stumbled upon on Flickr and then happily enjoyed her photos and words: Evany.

I don't know Evany from adam, but I used to read her regularly in Web Monkey Back in proverbial day. She cracked me up then. She cracks me up now. And I found out this morning she's got great fashion sense/style. :)

Evany is who inspired the Overheards I used to crank out so often back in the Web Ass days. So yea for Evany.

And now I'm more than an hour behind schedule. I think my Morning Pages have been kissed off and right now I best be focusing on doing a mad scramble. I've got a 9:00 meeting.

Ciao lovelies!

Overheard (at Pirates of the Carribbean in Disneyland)

At the sight of a pirate with a lit bottle...

Boy: Look! He's got a Mazaltov!!!

I'm still laughing. Mazal Tov Cocktail? What is that? Something they serve at special events? Ha ha ha!

me shooting dan

P1020503, originally uploaded by Twinmama.

i love this photo!

dan and i now have matching cameras (longish story that is more fun to tell than to hear). friday night the cameras got to meet each other. and angela took a shot. ;)

Week Three

Week Three, originally uploaded by emdot.

So, I guess I will take an early break this morning and tell you guys what I've been really into, really focused on these last couple of weeks.

Getting Fit.

A couple of months ago I was lamenting not having a group of people to lose weight with.... I mean, yes, I am surrounded by very supportive people. But I wanted partners in CRIME. I wrote about it in my Morning Pages (am doing The Artist's Way) and that was that.

Cut to three weeks ago.

See, I've been thinking about blogging my getting fit plan, but c'mon, how many people wanna read that? (Not even my mother raised a hand). But the type of person I am, to get into something, I kinda sorta mostly have to go overboard. Hog wild. Full steam ahead. And many other funny little phrases worthy of a maniac.

So, I used Backpack to create an intranet where I could spill my getting fit guts. Pages for food journals, checking off water intake, my workouts, meals I liked (so I can remember) the whole shebang.

And then, I invited a few friends to join in. In total, there are six of us (three couples, coincidentally... it didn't have to be that way). We weight in on Monday nights. And during the week we work out, write down what we eat and try to be healthier.

About two days into it I realized that I had created what I was wishing for: partners in crime. How cool is that? Plant those seeds, people. They grow.

The other thing I'm really extremely super into right now is listening to Jillian Michaels on her KFI radio show. You can download each one a day or so after it airs. I upload them to my iPod. What I love about Jillian is that she is both very motivating and very educational. I learn a lot from each show I've listened to. I've decided she's my Virtual Trainer. I heart her.

And finally, the irony. It used to be that The Biggest Loser night at my house was synonymous with Pizza Night. I know. I know. But every Tuesday night Steve would make an amazing pizza (from scratch; my man's got skillz) and we would eat it while watching TBL and loving the contradiction. Perhaps it's because TBL finished (yea Ali!) and we had to fill our evenings with something else... so now we go to the gym. And no pizza.

So that's my story, morninglories. I may actually keep a Get Fit blog, but it'll be at my wordpress blog instead, if I do it.

Meanwhile, if you want to listen to Jillian Michaels (and who doesn't?!), you can download her show at KFI640.com Click OnDemand. And then scoot yer mouse over to the Sunday column. Right click on her shows to save to your desk top and voila.

The Verbs

mirror, mirror, originally uploaded by emdot.

In the silence the verbs surround me
like faces of strangers,
            the verbs,
famished verbs, naked verbs,
essential verbs, deaf verbs,
verbs with no names, mere verbs,
verbs that live in caves,
speak in caves,
are born in caves,
under the shifting levels
of the universal optimism.

They go to work every morning,
mix cement, haul stones,
build the city. . . No, they erect
a monument to their own solitude.
They recede as we disappear in the memory
of someone else, they keep in step beside words,
and with their three tenses in line,
the verbs climb the hill Golgotha.

The sky is above them
like a bird above a cemetery.
The stand upright
as though in front of a closed door
and a man lifts his arm and drives nails
into the past
into the present
into the future.

— Iosip Brodsky