Wednesday, December 31, 2008
Sunday, December 14, 2008
Wednesday, December 03, 2008
And then Odetta. She had me in tears for about 10 minutes. She started out her set, sitting on her chair, looking all stately and royal and elegant and approachable at the same time. She said, I have something I want to read to you because every child and young person needs to hear it. Then she said, no I think everyone regardless of their age needs to hear it. And she read a part of nelson mandella's inauguration speech outloud.That was from back in the day when I hand-coded each of my blog posts, only we called in Online Journal in those days. :)
I couldn't believe it because I had only heard this bit a couple of months ago - I read it on someone's web site in the beginning of april. It moved me so much that I copied it down and put it on my own web site that very day. Those are the only places I had ever read it or even seen it. And there was Odetta saying it to the whole crowd. I had tears in my eyes.
And then she started to sing "this little light of mine, I'm going to let it shine / this little light of mine / I'm going to let it shine / this little light of mine / I'm going to let it shine / let it shine / let it shine / let it shine.
Only, she wasn't planning on singing it all by herself. She stopped the song about 10 seconds into it and she let us know how it was going to be. It was really moving. I already had tears in my eyes and live oak is an emotional place for me. They started streaming down my cheeks.
And all I could think about is my good fortune in having certain books and thoughts and support just drop into my lap since April. I am so fortunate and I really know that.
It was serendipity, I think. Synchronicity. It was beautiful. After an amazing set that finished much much too early, Odetta closed her set singing the same song and again, we all joined in (in fact had our own solos) and by then the singing was much more loud and beautiful.
Me: Odetta was amazing.
Me: Did you know she had a very poor daughter?
Me: She also had another daughter. A mean one. Vindetta.
Steve: And the daughter she couldn't remember?
Steve: And the one on the Simpson's...
Me. No. (stern face)
Me: Did you know one of her daughters was in a Spike Lee movie?
Me: No! Mo-Betta!
Steve: And Ho-getta.
Me: (shakes head)....
Tuesday, November 25, 2008
It took me a while to get on board that train, as before I was a huge Google Reader user, I was a huge lover of going to visit the sites I loved. I love seeing the entire site, not just the post. It was hard to let go of that. But let go (mostly) I did as Reader became easier and better to use and I realized how much time I saved getting everything in one place.
But what Google Reader is missing is an easier way to share what you love in your Reader. Sure, they give you stars for faving and an ability to share (with or without a note) with a few handful of people who opt-in through Gmail. And, they also give you a widget (what they call a window) that you can put on the sidebar of your blog so people can get a link to what you've recently shared (see the right-hand side of my blog for an example).
But I want to be Kottke, dammit. :) I want to easily be able to share an excerpt, a headline, a link and what I think of as a normal blog post. Flickr does this one click and I can share a photo right into my blog. Why can't Google do the same?
It would be a great service: you can easily share the great things you see and read right in your blog, and the original-writer gets correct links back, correct attribution, and all the rest.
So that is my wish. Somebody please invent this and then let me know about it. :) I will shout praises to your name right here in my little ol' Blog.
Sunday, November 23, 2008
Saturday, November 22, 2008
Friday, November 21, 2008
Karma means that whatever we do, with our bodies, speech, or minds, will have a corresponding result. Each action, even the smallest, is pregnant with its consequences. It is said by the masters that even a little poison can cause death, and even a tiny seed can become a huge tree. And as Buddha said: “Do not overlook negative actions merely because they are small; however small a spark may be, it can burn down a haystack as big as a mountain.”
Similarly he said: “Do not overlook tiny good actions, thinking they are of no benefit even tiny drops of water in the end will fill a huge vessel.” Sogyal Rinpoche
Tuesday, November 18, 2008
Monday, November 17, 2008
Today I worked very hard. It was just one of those days: lots to do and lots of strange energy to do it. (Strange because I am fighting either horrific allergies or a tenacious, low-level cold) (you'd think i'd have less energy). Seriously, I think I had a fever for most of the day.
Because of this, I have nothing to write about. So I thought I'd dip into my flickr archives and see what I could find there.
I found photos from an afternoon at San Carpoforo at the southern tail end of BigSurLandia. 7s and I went and looked for moonstone, but found mostly agate. We sat on the beach and drew in the sand and thanked our lucky stars. It was a very good day. (You can see more photos from this day below)
Sunday, November 16, 2008
I'm reading Martha Beck's book Steering by Starlight for the second time in two weeks.
The first time I "read" it was on tape (or MP3 or iPod or however we say such things now). I did a couple of the exercises in real-time, but the listening was so good that it was hard to stop and do the exercises instead of just plowing ahead.
It ended and for days I was on the weirdest, nicest, calmest, happiest Vacation of Bliss I had ever experienced. This includes at least one day where I was in a situation that was Not So Good. But it just didn't stick (the Not So Goodness)... it kind of just slipped away (not that I was avoiding it).
This time I am reading the book (reading reading) and doing the exercises at the same time. And again with the happy lightness.
So, I urge you to get this book. And if nothing else, just read the first three chapters and do the exercises. Just that could set you into this wonderful zone as well. And I wish that for everybody. :)
TidbitsLast night, dinner at Novo with Steve. Really fun and nice to be out having dinner. :)
I have SURRENDERED to the fact that I have allergies. Not a cold. This morning I took my first-ever Claritin D and man, I feel better. Still exhausted. But better.
Yesterday I stumbled upon the tail-end of the Proposition 8 Protest in Mitchell Park and took photos.
Saturday, November 15, 2008
Photojojo is a fun little service that sends you a time capsule of your more "interesting" photos posted to Flickr the year before.
I love getting these every two weeks... they are like little email presents. And as always, seeing your photos in a different venue (even just a different web site) makes them look different and somehow more special (really; it's true.).
» See my most recent time capsule
» Get one for yourself
Wednesday, November 12, 2008
As Buddha said in his first teaching, the root of all our suffering in samsara is ignorance. Ignorance, until we free ourselves from it, can seem endless, and even when we have embarked on the spiritual path our search is fogged by it. However, if you remember this, and keep the teachings in your heart, you will gradually develop the discernment to recognize the innumerable confusions of ignorance for what they are, and so never jeopardize your commitment or lose your perspective.The above is something you hear a lot if you are a Buddhist (at least one following a Tibetan lineage; I can't speak for other flavors).
Today I read this and it did a kapow zing to my spine. I read it as I'd never heard it before.
Does "ignorance" mean the incorrect "stories" we have that wrap around our every day experiences? The way we see ourself limited? Or see ourselves not connected to everything around us? The way we can perceive people to be against us? The way we can view ourselves as against others?
I'm reading Steering by Starlight, a kapow zing book by Martha Beck that is literally crumbling all kinds of mental barriers I have had throughout my life.
And reading this book has given me a crazy, bullish (as in tenacious) feeling of ease and glee.
And I wonder if that has to do with tearing down large parts of my ignorance.
Food for thought.
Tuesday, November 11, 2008
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): For many people, 10:30 a.m. is the single best time of day to come up with fresh insights and new ideas. But that won't exactly be true for you in the coming week. I mean, 10:30 *will* be a time when you're likely to be really smart, but then so will 11:30, 1:05, 2:37, 3:46, and 4:20. For that matter, 6:35 may also bring a gush of high intelligence, as well as 7:27, 8:19, and the last ten minutes before bedtime. What I'm trying to tell you, Virgo, is that you're in a phase when being brilliant should come pretty naturally.
With horoscopes like this, you are stupid to not choose to believe. ;)
Sunday, November 09, 2008
The October 14, 2007 Times featured Stephen Colbert guest-writing most of Maureen Dowd's column. In that article, Colbert satirically wrote: "Bad things are happening in countries you shouldn’t have to think about. It’s all George Bush’s fault, the vice president is Satan, and God is gay. There. Now I’ve written Frank Rich’s column too." Link
"In human life, if you feel you have made a mistake, you don't try to undo the past or the present, but you just accept where you are and work from there. Tremendous openness as to where you are is necessary."That really touched me today. Tremendous openness to where you are.
Chogyam Trungpa Rinpoche
This photo was taken in September in the Back Bay part of the Estero Bay. God I love it back there. See more pictures on this Flickr Places: Cuesta by the Sea page.
the entire apartment seems to be a rattlefest. it's very windy and i live on a hill. this means extra wind. and my apartment building is very old (almost 115 years old) which means windows are loose.
wind + hill + old = rattlefest.
i'm reading steering by starlight by martha beck. beck is the secular pema chodron. i find myself wanting to write her a thank you letter or make her something as a thank you gift.
Saturday, November 08, 2008
Friday, November 07, 2008
Yesterday I got a new computer at work. (I swear, this week has not been the best for non-distractions). It's a Mac -- my first work Mac in NINE years. Yea! Back into the fold I go. :)
So today I took some time to clean up/off my desk -- get the old computer and dual monitors off the desk, rearrange some things for Optimum Work Environment (tm emdot). And to reward myself I went and bought two new little plants to make the place look even better.
Plants are very good for you in your work space. :)
And there is a nursery (student run) on campus, so I just toodled on up there and picked out my new green, leafy babies. I should name them. Plant one: Barack. Plant two: Obama.
Okay, maybe not those names, but I really should name them. I'll let you know what I decide.
Wednesday, November 05, 2008
1. YES WE DID!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!, 2. UK Newspapers: the morning after, 3. Home Sweet Home | Hope Sweet Hope, 4. Obama!, 5. They Took to the Streets, 6. obama wins, 7. President Obama, 8. The First Black President, 9. EUROBAMA BASH PARTY INVITE, 10. Congratulations, Barack Obama!, 11. 171/365, 12. Go Obama!, 13. hope, 14. Yes, 15. good morning, america, 16. _RG00436, 17. Untitled, 18. ..., 19. Voted, 20. 308.366 | you're damn right i did!, 21. Hooray for the red white and blue, 22. Hope! Yes We Did!, 23. Untitled, 24. I Love My Country, 25. yes we can, 26. Barack Obama President : A dream come true, 27. Untitled, 28. maybe gloating a little..., 29. Untitled, 30. helen and i getting out the vote, 31. yes we did!, 32. Vote Obama, 33. 081104-2015-3, 34. Today, 35. Obama Rally - Houston, Texas36. Not available
Created with fd's Flickr Toys.
Tuesday, November 04, 2008
Step One: vote. check.
Step Two: acknowledge as you pull out of polling place parking lot that the metal-on-metal sound you hear tearing through your brain when applying brakes must be stopped.
Step Three: drive directly to shop; resign self to having to fork over a LOT of money for new brakes and probably new rotors.
Step Four: get to work.
Step Five: send file to printers; big project finally going to press. Yea! Plus, added bonus of no last-minute rush around problems.
Step Six: Get call from shop: brakes will be about $250 LESS than you anticipated.
Step Seven: thank your sweet stars above.
Step Eight: car's ready; go get it.
Step Nine: Reward self for most awesome day with new boots even though you went in for new maryjane's and they cost about $85 more than you planned to pay.
Step 10: try not to gloat too much about how awesome today is because you still have election coverage tonight and we really do not know how tonight will turn out but oh my god please please please let it be Barack Obama.
Monday, November 03, 2008
Sunday, November 02, 2008
I'm a big fan of elsa mora and her amazing papercuts as well as Patricia Zapata, AKA a little hut.
today i decided to try... first problem -- what to cut. second problem -- it's hard! :) these are about two inches tall. i think you can tell the one of the left is my frist attempt; the one on the right is the second
how elsita gets those smooth edges is beyond me. i will keep trying.
Saturday, November 01, 2008
Friday, October 31, 2008
Thursday, October 30, 2008
Last weekend I went to SF with one of my best friends -- she bought me
a ticket to the O You conference which is (hold your eye rolls)
centered around O Magazine (O as in Oprah). It wasn't an Oprah
event... it was a series of lecture-seminars from regular
contributors. I went to the Martha Beck, Suze Orman, Peter Walsh, and
Marianne Williamson seminars. Martha Beck and Suze Orman were my
favorites, but I find myself changed by one thing that Peter Walsh
said (I'll share in a sec.).
Oprah did make a surprise appearance (she'd never done it before at an
O You deal) and that was very cool. :) What I loved was seeing how the
contributors truly respected and were in awe of her.
What Peter Walsh said. It was in answering someone who said "what do I
do with paper clutter?!" (which I struggle with, too). He said think
of a load of laundry. If you were stop the laundry mid-cycle and just
let the clothes sit there in the water for a week, you'd go back to
some pretty stinky laundry and a much bigger mess on your hands. It's
the same with the mail -- if you bring it in and leave it on the
counter or pile it on your desk instead of "finishing the cycle" right
away, in a week you'll have a tub of stinky laundry.
This was a huge light bulb to me. All of a sudden I can see all of my
mid-cycle stops... aha! Finish the cycle. Finish the cycle. Finish the
cycle. Got it.
Wednesday, October 22, 2008
When little obstacles crop up on the spiritual path, a good practitioner does not lose faith and begin to doubt, but has the discernment to recognize difficulties, whatever they may be, for what they are—just obstacles, and nothing more. It is the nature of things that when you recognize an obstacle as such, it ceases to be an obstacle. Equally, it is by failing to recognize an obstacle for what it is, and therefore taking it seriously, that it is empowered and solidified and becomes a real blockage. Sogyal Rinpoche
Monday, October 13, 2008
Saturday, October 11, 2008
I brought my computer down to Orange County with me this weekend. My dad is a big computer nerd, always bragging about buidling this and improving that and updating that and whoop-do-doo doo doo bleep bloop (which is what my brain says as people begin to talk computers).
My computer has been at capacity for a couple of months. I keep having to delete things (lots of things) so that it will work. He said, "bring it down, we'll give you a new hard drive and update this and super charge that and bionic that and on and on bleep bloop."
What do you need to save? asked my dad.
My photos and music. Well, and everything in My documents. Can we do that?
Yes, he said.
Okay, then. Everything in my documents.
You know what happened right? My photos and music = GONE!
My fault, ultimately, because I didn't have anything backed up (my CD burner dealie bob stopped working in 05 and I just treated it with a dose of Denial and Whatever (a wreckless policy).
So, my fault. But that doesn't mean I'm happy about it. All my photos!! Fewer than 10% of my photos are on Flickr... so while I still have my Flickr photos, I don't have most of my photos. And since I rarely post photos of family or family events, those are all gone.
So, my fault. BUT STILL.
-- tears --
Today I will rigorously practice non-attachment.
Thursday, October 09, 2008
Monday, October 06, 2008
Sunday, October 05, 2008
Friday, September 26, 2008
This is an old-ish image from my Flickr stream that has been getting a lot of traffic and faves lately. I checked the stats and they seem to be coming from ffffound (and oh, ffffound how I do love you.).
How cool to have one of my images on ffffound! I love that.
And also, I love to see this photo pop up again and again in my "recent activity" list on Flickr as it IS a wonderful little reminder. :)
Happy day, people. It's Friday. And you are loved.
Oh! And PS, do you want to see the photos I fave on FFFFound? You can.... Check 'em out here.
Thursday, September 25, 2008
This was the first laugh of my day, this holy cow (bull?) from Dave Wild, aka publicenergy on Flickr.
I share with you two more funny ones below. Happy day people! ;) Make it a good one. And if you can't make it a good one, here are three photos (this one and the next two) that'll help you laugh about it.
Sunday, September 21, 2008
It was a rough week. But today, somehow, the clouds kinda lifted and for the first time in days (weeks?) I felt like I found my footing.
Steve and I made a sunset run to the coast. Or maybe that was a coast run to the sunset. We caught egrets and ducks and whimbrels and boats and bay. It was good.
Friday, September 19, 2008
Thursday, September 18, 2008
I just cracked myself up. These pelicans? Like my thoughts when things speed up and get complicated and I start to take things personally.
This morning I read this
Before Prince Siddhartha became the Buddha, he realized things were not quite right in his world. Neurosis was continuously spreading in his kingdom. He decided to reject any approach to life that made him purely comfortable and happy and to search for some psychological sanity beyond that. He thought that meditating and studying with the holy men of the time would help him. Then he would be able to rule his kingdom and be a better king. He left his palace and studied with various gurus, who taught him all kinds of techniques: holding his breath, not holding his breath, sitting in different postures doing spiritual acrobatics, and many other approaches. But he found these techniques kept his mind very busy, rather than being simple and alone."Before Prince Siddhartha became the Buddha, he realized things were not quite right in his world. Neurosis was continuously spreading in his kingdom. He decided to reject any approach to life that made him purely comfortable and happy and to search for some psychological sanity beyond that. " Man that sounds like the US right now. And no one wants to give up their comfort to do the hard work that needs to be done (regulations, raising taxes temporarily).
Having practiced for six years, he still had doubts about what he was doing. Then, it occurred to him that life is not so much a question of gain and loss. Instead, life is full of reality, and that reality rests in the mind. He realized that mind is constantly speeding, on and on. So Prince Siddhartha decided to stop that speed. He decided to sit and meditate under a bodhi tree on the banks of the Nairanjana River. His austerity had not proven to be the best way, so he decided to give that up. After sitting for a long time, not much happened. Then, he got up and walked around, and he was offered a drink of milk by a friend. He settled himself on a comfortable seat made of kusha grass. He began to relax and meditate again. At that moment, when he relaxed, the whole struggle began to dissolve. He realized that he shouldn't push so hard, but that he could give in and let himself go. That was the moment of enlightenment, which was not all that dramatic.
But beyond that... pretty noble... wanting to find a way to stop the neurosis in your country as a whole. I tend to stop at simply wanting to stop the neurosis in myself. :) Ha.
Anyway, good morning all. It's a beautiful morning.
Wednesday, September 17, 2008
re, the last post: i get home. make a sad face. 7s says "what's wrong?!" i tell him the story. he totally listens. provides his POV. and i feel ... better. hugely better. thank you, 7s.
pema chodron has an amazing book called Getting Unstuck where she discusses the buddhist idea of "shenpa." (thinking about a funny part where she sing-says-taunts, "I can see your shenpa).
i don't have the skills or grace to be able to explain this shenpa thing to you, but today, driving home i realized, "aha! this thing is my shenpa!" (i can see your shenpa, marya!). and i tried to just breathe. release. let it go. and give myself a break.
and also i prayed for her (person from previous post) happiness and the root of all happiness. and then i prayed for my own happiness and the root of all happiness. i prayed for us both. and that helped, too.
When it comes to people, I feel pretty resilient. I genuinely like damn-near everyone and I genuinely get along with damn-near everyone. So, maybe that is why I feel so "heart broken" or sad or confused about one person in my life who just simply hates me. And can't be nice. Has to be nasty (even with her nice face on).
Normally I am a firm believer in the "there are two sides to every story" -- even when it comes to myself -- but for this one, seriously? I did nothing wrong. Nothing. In fact, there is no way where I could have done anything right-er.
We used to be friends. And then we weren't (I was collateral damage in a relationship breakup... where the friends get cut out too). And to this day it still breaks my heart.
There is nothing I can do.
And truly I know I shouldn't take it personally (the way she treats me). This isn't about me. This is about her life-skill-set. Yet... it just hurts me to the bone.
And that's that. Maybe blogging it will help me feel better.
(Hello. Plus, I almost cried during a film trailer today, so maybe I'm just having an emotionally delicate time).
Tuesday, September 16, 2008
a personal message to me from rob breszney:
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): I hate to lay a sports metaphor on you, Virgo,Thanks, Rob. I needed that.
let alone one articulated by a hockey player. But it's such an apt
description of the approach that will work best for you in the coming
week, I had to bring it to your attention. "I skate to where the puck is
going to be, not to where it has been," quoth Wayne Gretzky. Apple CEO
Steve Jobs liked those words so much, he made them his own when he
introduced the iPhone to the public back in January 2007. Now I hope you
will find a way to apply the idea in your own sphere.
Thursday, September 11, 2008
I always look forward to Fall, the most beautiful season on the Central Coast. Plus, it's really just extended summer with a nip in the air.
This was taken last year in Baywood Park. I was recovering from my surgery... I think this was my first or second venture out. I spent about an hour taking photos in the back bay and then me and 7s had Thai food from Noi's.
That pretty much sums up my idea of a very good day.
Monday, August 25, 2008
This is in the spirit of helping those who feel obligated to get me a present (you really don't have to; let's just hang out or go for a hike) but don't know what in the hell to get me. There you can find all the little crafty books I'm eye-ing. (Eying? Eyeing? Is eye-ing not a word?)
Sunday, August 17, 2008
Friday, August 15, 2008
Friday, August 01, 2008
I'm pretty much the most un-angry person you'll ever meet. Either that or I'm completely out-of-touch with anger and am angry all the time and simply cloak it with the great cloak of "No Problem-No Worries-No I'm Fine-It's Fine-No Really-Fine." Perhaps I'm mostly un-angry and sometimes wearing the cloak. Whatever.
So, when I actually do feel angry, it gets my attention. And what I like about feeling angry is that it is a great motivator to act. To do what needs to be done. Things come into focus and you can see, oh. This isn't right and it needs to be taken care of.
And that is a great gift.
And PS, yeah, I'm a little pissed.
Friday, July 25, 2008
We get together once a week
To trek up on old volcanic tower
On Tuesdays we hike Bishop Peak
After work we form our clique
A hodge-podge group on trail for hours
We get together once a week
With eagerness and interest piqued
We take a path of dust and flowers
On Tuesdays we hike Bishop Peak
Somedays sunny and others bleak
We'll stay inside if the sky showers
We get together once a week
Hushed rabbits hide while vultures seek
Hear bird songs, cow moos, nature's bellowers
On Tuesday we hike Bishop peak
On Sundays we ready for the week
On Mondays - sigh - we're underpower
On Tuesdays we hike Bishop Peak
We get together once a week
Friday, July 18, 2008
Wednesday, July 16, 2008
Today an old list-serv chum Derek ran into a very old email I'd sent said list back in 2002. It made me smile today, so I share it with you, too. :)
that spam i am
that spam i am
i do not like that spam i am
would you like it in a can?
would you like it from a man?
would you like it in email?
would you like it from female?
not in a can, not from a man, not in email, not from female.
i would not like it on the net, i would not like it at the met, i would
not like it on tv, i do not like it, spam you see.
I guess there must have been some spam going around. Ah, how somethings never change. ;)
Tuesday, July 15, 2008
VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): "Dear Rob 'Fat-Burner' Brezsny: I used the Sweet and Sassy Toner video and lost only two pounds in five weeks. I tried the No More Love Handles program and actually gained weight. The only thing that really worked was your column. Reading your horoscopes has, I'm convinced, been responsible for bringing me much closer to having my dream body. You've helped me jettison a ton of psychic fat, not to mention a wad of guilt, a load of concern about what other people think of me, and a mass of remorse about the past. I never realized how much of my extra weight had to do with psychological burdens I was carrying. This is the lightest I've ever been! Grateful Virgo." Dear Grateful: Give yourself credit, too. It has been courageous of you to get rid of your unnecessary buffers. By the way, this week will be the climax of the shedding process. Celebrate your success by emptying out even more.