Friday, February 28, 2003


tricia made the coolest origami cranes -- three cranes in three different sizes all from one piece of paper -- beautiful.

carrie: how do people figure this out?!
marya: autism.
tricia: on the short bus.

Thursday, February 27, 2003

from deAnna

Overture, Curtain, Lights
This is it
The Night of Nights
Nor More rehearsing and nursing your part
You know every part by heart

Overture, Curtain, Lights
This is it
You'll hit the heights
And, oh, what heights you'll hit

On with the show
this is IT!
quasi-opening night

so here goes... jeremiah said, "has your stomach been overtaken with butterflies yet?" and i said something about considering drinking some pepto. he said, and wine! and i said, we'll mix it together and people will swirl the glass, take a whiff, look at the clarity and remark, "why so cloudy?"

but for real i think i'm going to meditate and do some maitri/tonglen. put it out there for the good of the bigger. or something. i'm going to shut up now.


bret: where are your new shoes?
marya: they are more of a slack shoe.
bret: aren't you a big enough slacker to wear them?

(written on a one-minute break at work)

Wednesday, February 26, 2003

more jazz hybrids

"Proper funk or junk? That's jazz-funk. Jazz-funk is like the love child of Marilyn Monroe and Henry Miller with her brains and his looks."

— Steve B.

Tuesday, February 25, 2003

so says bebop

steve b., from the shores of scotland, comments on the below. steve is the last word on music and musicsnobbery. in my book anyway.

"Personally I found Norah Jones kinda formulaic. Nice to hear for a change but insubstantial on closer inspection. She's no Rickie Lee Jones. Perhaps it's not jazz but so what? The Police weren't real reggae but they were still a great band. Remember the story I told dw about Duke Ellington in the club? Duke was in the front row watching a band of young guys who were blowing away to impress him. Backstage later they asked what he thought. He said, "Boy, you guys sure play a lotta notes." I don't think it's a coincidence jazz is a 4 letter word. Like wank."

all that jazz?

big talk over at ye ol' daveworld yesterday regarding the grammys and miss norah jones. one of the newly delurked listees has a husband who is a musician and it seems as if he might be a bit of a music snob. no judgment on that — to each his own. but this led our new listee to declare that jones was, indeed, Not Jazz (with which i thought her label, verve, might disagree).

so i decided that instead of getting into a big heated debate over what Is Jazz and what is Not Jazz (which is an unwinnable argument, btw, much like trying to convince some that folgers is not coffee and suave is not shampoo), i thought we could just add more definitions to our label-conscious music society. we could hyphenate — or we could just compound the words. or jam 'em together to make new ones.

here are some of those thoughts and suggestions:

maybe norah's playing quazz — quasi jazz.

or jop — jazzy pop.

or spazz — smokey piano jazz

what about all those shwidly piano guys (i used to date one of them)... shwazz. not to be confused with muzazz (pron muse-ass -- soft zz) which you often hear in the elevators... muzac posing as jazz.

norah also might be classified underneath the unfortunate "nepojasm" title, for those whose parents helped pave the way or open doors.

i improvise all the time on my guitar. maybe i'm playing jazz and didn't know. ;) i thought i just sucked. ;) this could be called whoopazz — as in whoops... jazz!

actually, mistakenly playing jazz is called misjazz. the problem with this is that the same word is used for those who think they are playing jazz (even their label might think they are playing jazz), but aren't. they are also playing misjazz.

more confusion comes in of course, as people misinterpret this as Miss Jazz, which at the moment is a title held by both diana krall in the united states and bebel gilberto in brazil (who actually plays jazzilian) (not to be confused with krall who actually *makes* jazilions).

our new listee offered up some new labels of her own which i thought were great: jazz-a-billy and bluegrazz. "jazz mixes well with all genres!" she said, and i agree. and now we finally have a way to classify bela fleck.

Monday, February 24, 2003

god loves chrissie hynde

"Don't think that sticking your boobs out and trying to look fuckable will help. Remember you're in a rock 'n' roll band. It's not "fuck me," it's "fuck you."

— Advice to female rockers from Chrissie Hynde
play update — starting the countdown
yesterday was "tech" day for the play which i guess is a notoriously boring day for actors. there is no acting, just standing on the stage while they get your lighting correct for each scene. only our play doesn't have "scenes" but 3 acts and some 100 "moments." so there's a lot of different lighting.

i was expecting to be there for 12 hours or something, but the director gave the lighting guy strict rules: he couldn't keep the actors for more than four hours. so, we went home at five. pretty damn easy.

most of the time was just hanging out in the lobby chatting and laughing and eating (we had a huge potluck; i brought pad thai and scored extra points). one of the castmembers used to cut hair for a living and a few guys needed a trim (to say the least) for their parts. he ended cutting at least three of the guys hair including the director.

but the fun part was being out in the courtyard of the theater which is one block from downtown, so lots of people are walking by. and as the director gets his hair cut the guys burst into all kinds of songs — and they can sing. loud, bravado, broadway voices. but they were all dirty and nasty, funny songs from monty python and tenacious d. it was pretty hilarious. ;)

so we only have two more rehearsals: full run in costume tonight and then dress rehearsal on tuesday. wednesday is "dark" (i'm learning new terms all the time). and then thursday is our unofficial opening night -- it's a benefit night for one of the organizations. then friday — big time opening night. yea!

everyone on the cast seems amazed by how smoothly everything is going. they all say they've never felt so ready for opening night. and either that means our cast kicks ass or we've got some unexpected uh-oh's coming up. also, everyone seems pretty impressed that the cast is getting along so well. no prima donnas. i think this is because there are no stars in this play — no one is the big star. lots of first-timers and nearly everyone is in the play because of it's content; for matthew.

meanwhile i'm totally fighting off a cold. no no no no no. that's what i'm telling my sinuses. go away is what i'm telling my sore throat. and quit yer wheezing is what i'm telling my lungs. i hope they listen.

Thursday, February 20, 2003

happy birthday to my favorite danish canuck. for your birthday, carsten, i give you cool sketchbooks a la raebean and witold. i give you beautiful winter pictures from california (practically a tour of where i live -- including my house) and a desktop to help you dream of california. i send you tickets to the upcoming play. i send you on a world trip. and i send you an old, rough song.

Monday, February 17, 2003

i love the bean for many reasons

reason #1: brooklyn blizzard pics. run thy fingers, do not walk them, to raebean now to check 'em out. there will be a time when we'll say "we knew her when." that time will probably be when we are at some fancy-shmancy museum looking at her shtuff on walls.

reason #2: she is the only other person i know who might want to bite something (even if it is hard and metal) because she likes it so much. read the blog to find out if swiss sewing machines chip teeth.

Sunday, February 16, 2003

o.c. for alvin ailey

friday i had the day off which meant i got to leisurely read the l.a. times. with a cup of coffee. sublime. inside was an article on alvin ailey. his company often performs at royce hall at ucla, but i've never seen them. l.a. is a tougher place for me to get to as i don't know anyone there and don't have a place to stay and am not really that familiar with the area.

but this time they are performing in orange county. where as la might be tougher, it couldn't get easier than orange county. so i called my dad -- yes, he and janet would love to go too! great. next step -- tickets. sold out. of course. but nevertheless, dad said he'd take care of the tickets if i drove down.

so, the next day and four hours later (vrooming down the 101 and 405) i was in orange county. land of shopping and tidyness. and today, alvin ailey. dad scored the sweet tickets, too. more later, but meanwhile, check the alvin ailey web site.

or read the orange county register's article on a weekend in morro bay.

Saturday, February 15, 2003

impromptu reception

ana and jim got married at the court house. i didn't go, but i did meet them for the after ceremony soiree. ana was beautiful in a sleek, long taupe-ish dress that was one beautiful drape, a delicate strap, a perfect dress. jim was suitin' it up in equally beautiful creamy brown and the most gorgeous tie with purple swirlies. they were sleek and sabley and creamy and gorgeous. i thought it was perfect wedding attire.

afterwards, but without meaning to, we all congregated for an impromptu reception at the house. strictly makeshift, we busted out candles and cleared tables and lowered lights and ordered pizza.

we tried to get them to eat at robin's. when that failed we suggest thai — thai for everybody. i'm not quite sure how thai turned into pizza, but the woodstocks delivery guy obligingly showed up and we all drank chai beer (made by louis) and slices of pepperoni-and-cheese with the sleek and sabley couple.

we migrated to the deck and tommy (of geggy tah) serenaded ana with the songs she wanted to hear. she is part of the inspiration to the song "don't close the door" (they shared a house years back in l.a. and she would close the door to study while the band practiced). tommy sang that but changed the lyrics for her wedding. he sang holly oak and space heater and dumb submarine and starting over (uh huh uh huh, nuh uh nuh uh) and this really beautiful song called "write your worries." well, ana called it "write your worries." i've tried to find it online and can't so maybe it goes by a different title.

but this song, write your worries, was just beautiful and sweet. and here we all were, celebrating our friends marraige and it was one of the more beautiful moments in life. all of us on the deck, gathered around dan's patio heater, toasting jim and ana and being surrounded by tommy's dreamtime lyrics.

ana and jim left for a cambria night and might be back today -- but only briefly. they have a new home they are moving into today.

Friday, February 14, 2003

sock pups, part one

the beginning of the emdot prototype.

trina and mr. argyle. or was it ms. argyle?

i think this is the beginning of a beautiful friendship.


ryan h: his name is kenneth rexroth?
laura: mm-hmm.
ryan h: he goes by kenneth?
laura: maybe his friends call him kenny...
marya: kendog rexroth.
ryan h: k-money!

Thursday, February 13, 2003

happy valentines day, jim and ana

i have a big ol' fat day off tomorrow. which means four day weekend. which means friday morning bliss. this will blend into friday afternoon bliss as i will be joining many others at GiGi's at 3pm for post wedding celebration for jim mathis and ana riso. that's right folks: they're gettin' hitched! there are three weddings planned, the first tomorrow. the second, later in the summer. and the third next winter in argentina. definitely a reason to celebrate!
sites to visit

somehow we found ourselves at witold riedel... well, it was because of the sock dog, and all. but so many reasons to stay: the sketchbooks. the "it's your time" drawings. and all that writing.

and then there's eli. elias. mr. crouch. we used to live with elias. now he's norcal bound, skatin' and creatin'. there're movies and photos and new ways to look at many things. check it out.

bean just sent this to me. only one thing to do with it and it is to put it up. this is ryan h. and jen in nyc with ms. bean. you might remember some of their journey, posted here, as they were the ones who had the snake in the engine of the truck from oregon to washington. same trip.

the new craze sweeping the nation

it started innocently enough. a little trip over to loobylu and she linked to pickleberry. pickleberry stuck in the mind. the friends and i cooed over the cuteness. little did we know an obsession was being planted. then came the dog and man. you have to admit: he is pretty damn cute. and the guy's not bad, either. this led to the gallery. the gallery led to other sitings. which led us to actually buy a martha stewart kids magazine and pillow filler. and buttons. and socks.

tonight carrie, trina, kb and i will meet at the prearranged time at the prearranged place, plans in place and scissors in hand. more updates as they come in.

Wednesday, February 12, 2003

gift to you

here's that song i wrote about on sunday... special offer short time download. ;)


marya: wasn't that cookie good?
stu: that wasn't a cookie. that was nirvana.
stu: "cookie" is an inadequate word for what that was.

ryan: have you ever seen a life-sized doll house?
marya: those are called "apartments," ryan.

Tuesday, February 11, 2003

overheard, while checking email...

ben: whoa! he's mad-caps-ing me!


if you are super busy at work and trying to do a million things within one work day because there are another million things waiting for tomorrow and one minute it is the beginning of your day, the next is lunch and the next everyone has gone home for the day, you might understand where ben is coming from...

ben: do you want meet later? like from 5:30 to 6:30?
kristin: it's 5:30 in five minutes.
ben: f**k! why is it always 5:30 in five minutes??!!

Monday, February 10, 2003

quickly becoming my favorite

clandestina. a couple of days ago i put a link up. quickly this is becoming my favorite site. i love the simple design. but the pictures. the pictures are powerful. find, if you can, the argentine riot. the pictures of bern — the sweet face looking at the bird on the door or the two gigglers. beautiful. simple. bittersweet. go go go. go now.

currently is my favorite

said a friend a few weeks ago: Let me know how rehearsal goes. I am into actress worship. I can be quite a groupie.

rehearsals. i could go every night. i know a lot of people are kind of bored with it. and maybe it's because it's my first play. maybe its because i'm a big dork. (all of the above?) but it is easily my favorite thing. i only wish i could read my part three, four more times a night. i know. i know. big dork. :)

my friends michael and carrie are in the play too. carrie is a seasoned vet. she had the female lead in "a few good men" a coupla years back. she left wa last year to be a full-time actress and travel through europe performing medea. she could be a star — pretty and thin and a really good actress. those are all the ingredients, right?

michael and i are newbies. i remember at auditions michael did a nervous thing with his foot, almost like he was twirling his hair nervously on stage. that has all vanished now. he owns his character and his part is perfect for him -- he both lends comic relief and some of the most poignant moments (tsst tsst tsst tsst is all i will tell you now, but you'll see for yourself if you come to a performance). and the foot twirl is gone. he's really good.

and me... i don't know. i can't tell if i'm underacting or overacting. i can't help but wish i had more lines, just because it is so much fun.

yesterday, running my lines by myself at my house — the feeling was just there — how my character must have felt. and each time i read, without even trying, little tears would pool in the corner of my eyes. but get me at rehearsal and i dry up. it's hard to keep that momentum or sensation with people reading funny lines or just watching the hustle and bustle of scenes and scene changes.

three more weeks before opening night. and watching it all come together is a fun process to watch and be a part of in and of itself.

Sunday, February 09, 2003


carsty's got new pics of his apartment in berlin and i want to visit even more... but before then i'm thinking i need to find a new place to live myself. i'm totally inspired. by carsten's place and by heidi's last night. plus, it's time. time to move on. time for change. time for new space. if you live in slo and hear of any one bedrooms (preferably an apartment), lemme know.

when you rent an apartment in berlin you get just the apartment — no ammenities. so carsten's had to put in his own sinks, cupboards, oven and stove, etc. and i thought it was tough when a place didn't come with a washer and a dryer. :)
chit chat

i should listen to stu more often.

we're on this sympatico musical trip lately. i've turned him on to uncle tupelo and he's found a real appreciation of jay farrar. he's passed on many a folk/bluegrass/old-timey cd into my hand. a few weeks ago he sent me links to the be good tanyas. but i was busy and couldn't really think about taking the time to even just visit a web site to listen to samples and that day tumbled into several others which became a week and then another and next thing i knew i'd forgotten completely about the tip.

cut to yesterday. listening to the minstrel song show and this song comes on. my ears perk up because it reminds me of old-old-old poi dog pondering. i waited at the end of the song to find out who it was. i was half-expecting the dj to say it was an all-girl-cover of a little known frank orrall song. but, nope it was the be good tanyas. and i wonder if they've ever heard "wishing like a mountain, thinking like the sea."

the all-girl wear-red make-valentines night

heidi's party was last night and i loved every minute of it. number one, heidi's house is a creative inspiration in and of itself. jewel-hued saturated walls with equally deep and saturated curtains. art on every wall and i don't mean frilly frumpy art but big bold beautiful expressive human art. lantern after chinese lantern hanging from her kitchen ceiling. metal baskets hanging in a vertical line filled to capacity with pencils. a champagne bucket overflowing with art markers. and that's just the every-day stuff. for the art supplies it was bright feathers to erotic victorian postcards to photocopies of love poems to sequins to all kinds of papers and scissors and glues and paints.

everyone wore red and drank wine and nibbled on sweet treats. normal talk, girl talk, and jokes intermingled with great attention to cutting things out and pasting things on. at least three painters were there — i was familiar with all of their work.

but the best was just being at a party with all these new women i'd never met before and just idly chatting and creating and slowly sipping red wine. i could do that every night.

meanwhile, it is a beautiful day.

i mean spectacular. i jumped on my bike and headed downtown and bought four new cds. i'm embarrassed about one of them, but will have to get over it. i got the be good tanyas, the soundtrack to the pianist (mostly chopin), belle and sebastian, and the dixie chicks. that's right folks — tdc. and that is kind of embarrassing for i'm not even sure why. but i was almost too embarrassed to purchase it at the counter. i got over myself though.

they were on snl last night and i loved loved loved the soldier song they sang. enough to have to suck it up at boo boos and make the purchase.

afterwards i was hanging in the backyard with michael and jason j as they worked on their respective projects and i hula-hooped in the sunshine. this basically equates to the ideal afternoon. it's gotta turn into winter sooner or later, doesn't it? meanwhile i'll get in the hoopin' while i can.

Saturday, February 08, 2003

what is poetry?

"Poetry is just thought; perhaps distilled, perhaps drawn out, it is nothing. It is really nothing, and — a prerequisite if you will — most if not all good poets understand this. Good poets, if they have anything to say, struggle or dance with nothingness directly all the time. It is understood by people who write it, read it, and even by people who never have that poetry can be garbage, with all of the stick in the mud stink in tow, but, and here's the cusp, many know that it can also express genuine compassion, co-emergent wisdom, and pith instructions straight from the horses mouth." — J. Elliot 2/8/3

meanwhile... a poem I read today by e. e. cummings...

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in

i carry your heart with me(i carry it in
my heart)i am never without it(anywhere
i go you go,my dear;and whatever is done
by only me is your doing,my darling)
i fear
no fate(for you are my fate,my sweet)i want
no world(for beautiful you are my world,my true)
and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant
and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows
(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud
and the sky of the sky of a tree called life;which grows
higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)
and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart)

— e. e. cummings

i don't know much about cummings's life except that he must have really been in love — he writes some the sharpest, least sappy, completely encompassing love poems out there. perfect for valentines day. all you lovers out there — drink up!

Friday, February 07, 2003

travel vicariously

cool site i found through the mirror project. i love this design i love this design i love this design. the best part (that i saw in the few minutes spent there) were the travel pictures, especially ankor watt (sp?).

new and cool gallery at the mirror project: infinite regress. click through all ten.

or, find your favorite emdot.
i love my clients, part 3

talking about people's "style" with my client, who is an extravert like me...

lj: now intraverts, they have to consider things. so they sit there quietly. and they think. but you can't really tell cuz sometimes they don't even move thier eyes! people confuse this with intelligence.

Wednesday, February 05, 2003

snippets from pema chodron interview

Tricycle: What cultivates genuine compassion?

Pema Chodron: Genuine compassion comes from the fact that you see your own limitations: you wish to be kind and you find that you aren't kind. Then, instead of beating yourself up you see that that's what all human beings are up against and you begin to have some kind of genuine compassion for the human condition. And you see how challenging it is to be a human being. You try to be peaceful and never to raise your voice and you find out that you have a lot of rage. The dharma is about making friends with the groundlessness and discomfort of those feelings. It is not about making rules so that those emotions never arise. Compassion doesn't come from trying to clean up the whole act.


Tricycle: How do you understand the bodhisattva vow?

Pema Chodron: The bodhisattva vow has something to do with going cold turkey, naked, without any clothes on into whatever situation presents itself to you, and seeing how you hate certain people, how people trigger you in every single way, how you want to hold on, how you want to get in bed and put the covers over your head. Seeing all of that just increases your compassion for the human situation. We're all up against not finding ourselves perfect, and still wanting to be open and be there for others. My sense of what it means to be a bodhisattva on the path, a student-warrior-bodhisattva, is that you are constantly caught with "don't know." Can't say yes, can't say no. Can't say right, can't say wrong.

Read the whole article from Tricycle magazine.

and on a totally different note... hello flip side of the coin.
the little things

i'll be audi for the next coupla days — san rafael bound. i wish i was spending more time up there — so many people I wish I could visit. maya, darius (dariyumminess as he is known to me and my pals) city-ish. sir matteson and erin n. (la songbird), both living santa cruzian style. next time next time. but this is going to be drive-drive-drive-sleep-sleep-sleep-drive-drive-drive.

a couple of quotes from the sun magazine...

"There are plenty of good reasons for fighting... but no good reason ever to hate without reservation, to imagine that God Almighty Himself hates with you, too. Where's evil? It's that large part of every man that wants to hate without limit, that wants to hate with God on its side." — Kurt Vonnegut.

"True compassion is more than flinging a coin to a beggar; it understands that an edifice that produces beggars needs restructuring." — Martin Luther King, Jr.

"The only reason we don't open our hearts and minds to other people is that they trigger confusion in us that we don't feel brave enough or sane enough to deal with. To the degree that we look clearly and compassionately at ourselves, we feel confident and fearless about looking into someone else's eyes." — Pema Chodron.

"Whatever people in general do not understand, they are always prepared to dislike; the incomprehensible is always the obnoxious." — L.E. Landon.


emdot1: hey -- *you* are a big guy, so for you to say someone else was big... this guy must be a mountain!!
Bryon: thanks for that
Bryon: i appreciate your observation that I'm a foothill.

Tuesday, February 04, 2003

wooden cracker wall papers

woodencracker took some beautiful flower shots. perfect for wallpapers! get 'em while they're hot. (happy belated bd to wc, as well. jan 31.)

Monday, February 03, 2003


kim: It's been a bit difficult because, one it's hard as hell and two it's hard as hell.

kim just started an mba program three week's ago, which explains the quote above. kim was one of my best friends from high school and now currently lives in d.c. friday is her birthday.
overheard? overread? :: synchronicities

from an email i read on a list-serv i'm on. the email wasn't to me, but i found it very clever and interesting... enough to pass on...

----begin email----

I also try to read the messages from the phenomenal world. For example the hottest summer in recorded history in Australia, with bush fires in the papers every day. I would read the headlines and think, "what does it all mean?" Bush fires. Bush fires? That's it I decided one day, the message is, "Fire Bush!"

Then there the matter of the UN resolution on Iraq. The Chinese take numbers and sound very seriously and numbers have homonyms --like 8 (ba) sounds exactly like "money comes" and 6 (liu) sounds like "everything goes smoothly." To get a phone number in China or a car license plate with 666 888 would be very very expensive. Another number people like is 9 because it is big yang, the dragon number. 1 (yao) is ok, it sounds like "I want." The number no one wants is 4, since it is pronounced exactly like the word for death, "si" (pronounced suh).

So the UN Resolution that gives the US the right to invade Iraq is 1441, which in Mandarin Chinese is yao si si yao, meaning "I want to die, death is what I want." No Chinese person would every agree to such a number. In fact no Chinese person would ever live in a hotel room with a number like that.


----end email----
read it

an interview with the creators of homestar runner and strong bad email. thanks to ryan w. for the inside tip.

Saturday, February 01, 2003

ilan ramon

npr today said that the shuttle crash is especially sad for the nation of israel. with nothing but war news for the last two years, israel had gravitated to ilan ramon becoming the first israeli in space. every child in an israeli school knows all about ramon -- the teachers have been doing lesson plans about him for weeks. here are a few links if you want to read more about him (found on google):

Profile: Israeli Astronaut Ilan Ramon Brings Pride To Israelis And Relief From Focusing On Ongoing Violence And Upcoming Election
NASA biographical data.
Crew Interview.