Monday, April 29, 2002

A letter to Kate

letter to kate in the higher reaches of the Canadian prairie

I think the idea about the magazine is a good one. I have long had a thought about having a web site for my "writing" friends -- a vault of sorts (that's what I call one part of my web site that I want to evolve more). I envision a place where there are a number of regulars -- you can go to the site and visit these different people to see what is going on with them. So many of my friends are into varied and very interesting things -- Jan who is living in Hondurus (spelling??), Maya in S.F. (she's spent some time in the dw halls), Raylene who bravely moved to NYC two weeks after September 11 to become a famous architect; and then of course my wonderful, illustrious, and prolific dw friends (past and present). ;)

What is your vision for the magazine? What are your plans?

Meanwhile... I must be going through what my dad calls the Düns (pron: dunes), which is a type of Trap of Doubt. You know you are in the Düns when you get sick or get repeatedly sick... Last week I pinched a nerve in my neck/shoulder, and this morning I woke up with a sore throat. I'm "moving." More like "in transition." My place is getting painted -- I've lived in this particular space for almost 7 years. So, I moved everything I own outta there into a temporary situation -- which has actually been fun. However, I felt completely overwhelmed when it came time to choose paint colors and to figure out how to redo my place so that it looks nicer and is more functional. Sounds like not-big decisions on paper, but in RL put me in a quasi-low-grade tail spin which I tried to ignore like a hangnail.

Instead of going with calming colors (which I probably need) I went with favorite colors; a decision I need to have faith in. These are colors that I could roll around in -- the ones that I love and point out all the time in nature. A periwinkle blue that is at times the color of a twilight sky, or a detail in a shadowed lake. A brick-ish, wine-ish red which I am just drawn to and shows up in my wardrobe and quilt and other little things around me. My housemate helped me to pick out a neutral-ish creamy yellow with a hint of green. And white for ceiling and other accents. (Yellow = main walls; periwinkle = wainscotting; red = around doors and windows and for the mantle; white = ceiling, top of wainscotting, and one big window area).

I saw the yellow on the walls last night and it is ... ummm... much brighter on a big space than it is on a 3 x 3 color sample. (Trust trust trust).

It'll work out. I do have faith. Faith and a sore throat and a soiree, a rendezvous, a mild detour into The Trap of Doubt.

Or maybe I just was exposed to a virus [smile].

Other things: I spent the weekend in Ojai for Shambhala Training, Level IV, taught by Dr. Joseph Parent. It was by far my favorite of the levels to date. Just one more Level and I complete this part of the training. There is advanced training, too, which I am planning on taking. About 13 hours of sitting (meditation practice) this weekend. At a dhatun, which is a month-long retreat common within my sangha, you sit 9 hours a day. So I am thinking I shouldn't complain about 13 hours spread over three days. So, I'm not complaining. Just.... mmmmm... pointing out. Yeah, that's it. (Actually, the sitting wasn't that bad ... somehow after the third day you begin to want to practice even longer).

I love getting your journal email. It makes me feel like I am part of a community. ;)

Love,

Marya

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