Was there someone angry and yelly behind you in traffic today?

If you happened to have been on the 101 South or the 405 South today and noticed a scowly, angry woman in the car behind you and she was throwing her hands up in the air and seemingly mouthing big silent words in the confines of her own car, that was probably me.

And here is what I was yelling, for my own benefit but in your honor, in the privacy of my own car:

a.) GET OFF THE PHONE IF YOU'RE GOING TO BE IN THE FAST LANE.
b.) YOU MUST DRIVE FASTER THAN 75 TO BE IN THE FAST LANE.
c.) YOU MUST DRIVE FASTER THAN 70 TO BE IN THE FAST LANE.
d.) YOU MUST DRIVE AT LEAST THE SPEED LIMIT TO BE IN THE FAST LANE.
e.) PLEASE FOR THE LOVE OF GOD DRIVE FASTER THAN 60 IN THE FAST LANE.
f.) Ass! (this one wasn't yelled as much as strongly stated).

But seriously, if you are in the fast lane please do not be looking at the keypad of your cell phone trying to dial numbers okay? Driving in Southern California is serious business. GET OFF YOUR PHONE, Ass!