soloist

soloist, originally uploaded by emdot.

Ever since hearing the Fresh Air interview of Steve Lopez a few months ago, I've been looking forward to seeing The Soloist.

» Listen to the interview

thoughts are like pelicans

little known fact: sometimes pelicans wish they were hummingbirds, originally uploaded by emdot.

I just cracked myself up. These pelicans? Like my thoughts when things speed up and get complicated and I start to take things personally.

This morning I read this

Before Prince Siddhartha became the Buddha, he realized things were not quite right in his world. Neurosis was continuously spreading in his kingdom. He decided to reject any approach to life that made him purely comfortable and happy and to search for some psychological sanity beyond that. He thought that meditating and studying with the holy men of the time would help him. Then he would be able to rule his kingdom and be a better king. He left his palace and studied with various gurus, who taught him all kinds of techniques: holding his breath, not holding his breath, sitting in different postures doing spiritual acrobatics, and many other approaches. But he found these techniques kept his mind very busy, rather than being simple and alone.

Having practiced for six years, he still had doubts about what he was doing. Then, it occurred to him that life is not so much a question of gain and loss. Instead, life is full of reality, and that reality rests in the mind. He realized that mind is constantly speeding, on and on. So Prince Siddhartha decided to stop that speed. He decided to sit and meditate under a bodhi tree on the banks of the Nairanjana River. His austerity had not proven to be the best way, so he decided to give that up. After sitting for a long time, not much happened. Then, he got up and walked around, and he was offered a drink of milk by a friend. He settled himself on a comfortable seat made of kusha grass. He began to relax and meditate again. At that moment, when he relaxed, the whole struggle began to dissolve. He realized that he shouldn't push so hard, but that he could give in and let himself go. That was the moment of enlightenment, which was not all that dramatic.

"Before Prince Siddhartha became the Buddha, he realized things were not quite right in his world. Neurosis was continuously spreading in his kingdom. He decided to reject any approach to life that made him purely comfortable and happy and to search for some psychological sanity beyond that. " Man that sounds like the US right now. And no one wants to give up their comfort to do the hard work that needs to be done (regulations, raising taxes temporarily).

But beyond that... pretty noble... wanting to find a way to stop the neurosis in your country as a whole. I tend to stop at simply wanting to stop the neurosis in myself. :) Ha.

Anyway, good morning all. It's a beautiful morning.

boyfriend for the save

morro bay watch, originally uploaded by emdot.

re, the last post: i get home. make a sad face. 7s says "what's wrong?!" i tell him the story. he totally listens. provides his POV. and i feel ... better. hugely better. thank you, 7s.

pema chodron has an amazing book called Getting Unstuck where she discusses the buddhist idea of "shenpa." (thinking about a funny part where she sing-says-taunts, "I can see your shenpa).

i don't have the skills or grace to be able to explain this shenpa thing to you, but today, driving home i realized, "aha! this thing is my shenpa!" (i can see your shenpa, marya!). and i tried to just breathe. release. let it go. and give myself a break.

and also i prayed for her (person from previous post) happiness and the root of all happiness. and then i prayed for my own happiness and the root of all happiness. i prayed for us both. and that helped, too.

i could have been an eagle

i could have been an eagle, originally uploaded by emdot.

When it comes to people, I feel pretty resilient. I genuinely like damn-near everyone and I genuinely get along with damn-near everyone. So, maybe that is why I feel so "heart broken" or sad or confused about one person in my life who just simply hates me. And can't be nice. Has to be nasty (even with her nice face on).

Normally I am a firm believer in the "there are two sides to every story" -- even when it comes to myself -- but for this one, seriously? I did nothing wrong. Nothing. In fact, there is no way where I could have done anything right-er.

We used to be friends. And then we weren't (I was collateral damage in a relationship breakup... where the friends get cut out too). And to this day it still breaks my heart.

There is nothing I can do.

And truly I know I shouldn't take it personally (the way she treats me). This isn't about me. This is about her life-skill-set. Yet... it just hurts me to the bone.

And that's that. Maybe blogging it will help me feel better.

(Hello. Plus, I almost cried during a film trailer today, so maybe I'm just having an emotionally delicate time).

(no longer) clinging to summer

clinging to summer, originally uploaded by emdot.

a personal message to me from rob breszney:

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): I hate to lay a sports metaphor on you, Virgo,
let alone one articulated by a hockey player. But it's such an apt
description of the approach that will work best for you in the coming
week, I had to bring it to your attention. "I skate to where the puck is
going to be, not to where it has been," quoth Wayne Gretzky. Apple CEO
Steve Jobs liked those words so much, he made them his own when he
introduced the iPhone to the public back in January 2007. Now I hope you
will find a way to apply the idea in your own sphere.

Thanks, Rob. I needed that.

hello you beautiful world

hello you beautiful world, originally uploaded by emdot.

I always look forward to Fall, the most beautiful season on the Central Coast. Plus, it's really just extended summer with a nip in the air.

This was taken last year in Baywood Park. I was recovering from my surgery... I think this was my first or second venture out. I spent about an hour taking photos in the back bay and then me and 7s had Thai food from Noi's.

That pretty much sums up my idea of a very good day.

Dear Family, Don't Know What to Get Me for My Birthday?

I'm sharing my Amazon.com Wish list. :)



This is in the spirit of helping those who feel obligated to get me a present (you really don't have to; let's just hang out or go for a hike) but don't know what in the hell to get me. There you can find all the little crafty books I'm eye-ing. (Eying? Eyeing? Is eye-ing not a word?)

Reykjanes

Reykjanes, originally uploaded by sara johanna.

Sara Johanna in Iceland continues to be one of my favorite photographers on Flickr, not to mention one of my favorite painters.

knock knock knock on wood

knock knock knock on wood, originally uploaded by emdot.

It is pouring rain right now, so hopefully this fire will be out by the time the storm is over. Steve is worried about the grapes -- harvest is coming up!

burning fuel

you tell it sister, originally uploaded by emdot.

I'm pretty much the most un-angry person you'll ever meet. Either that or I'm completely out-of-touch with anger and am angry all the time and simply cloak it with the great cloak of "No Problem-No Worries-No I'm Fine-It's Fine-No Really-Fine." Perhaps I'm mostly un-angry and sometimes wearing the cloak. Whatever.

So, when I actually do feel angry, it gets my attention. And what I like about feeling angry is that it is a great motivator to act. To do what needs to be done. Things come into focus and you can see, oh. This isn't right and it needs to be taken care of.

And that is a great gift.

And PS, yeah, I'm a little pissed.

For KB who gets us together for weekly mountain meanderings

today's hike, originally uploaded by emdot.

We get together once a week
To trek up on old volcanic tower
On Tuesdays we hike Bishop Peak

After work we form our clique
A hodge-podge group on trail for hours
We get together once a week

With eagerness and interest piqued
We take a path of dust and flowers
On Tuesdays we hike Bishop Peak

Somedays sunny and others bleak
We'll stay inside if the sky showers
We get together once a week

Hushed rabbits hide while vultures seek
Hear bird songs, cow moos, nature's bellowers
On Tuesday we hike Bishop peak

On Sundays we ready for the week
On Mondays - sigh - we're underpower
On Tuesdays we hike Bishop Peak
We get together once a week

— Marya Figueroa

Yes I was a scaredy cat

nostalgia: me at the san diego zoo, originally uploaded by emdot.

5 things I was afraid of when I was 12

1. scoliosis
2. punk rock
3. heavy metal
4. not going to heaven
5. 8th graders

last day for the old chairs

last day for the old chairs, originally uploaded by emdot.

Today an old list-serv chum Derek ran into a very old email I'd sent said list back in 2002. It made me smile today, so I share it with you, too. :)

that spam i am
that spam i am
i do not like that spam i am

would you like it in a can?
would you like it from a man?
would you like it in email?
would you like it from female?

not in a can, not from a man, not in email, not from female.

i would not like it on the net, i would not like it at the met, i would
not like it on tv, i do not like it, spam you see.

I guess there must have been some spam going around. Ah, how somethings never change. ;)

I love you, Rob Brezny

VIRGO (Aug. 23-Sept. 22): "Dear Rob 'Fat-Burner' Brezsny: I used the Sweet and Sassy Toner video and lost only two pounds in five weeks. I tried the No More Love Handles program and actually gained weight. The only thing that really worked was your column. Reading your horoscopes has, I'm convinced, been responsible for bringing me much closer to having my dream body. You've helped me jettison a ton of psychic fat, not to mention a wad of guilt, a load of concern about what other people think of me, and a mass of remorse about the past. I never realized how much of my extra weight had to do with psychological burdens I was carrying. This is the lightest I've ever been! Grateful Virgo." Dear Grateful: Give yourself credit, too. It has been courageous of you to get rid of your unnecessary buffers. By the way, this week will be the climax of the shedding process. Celebrate your success by emptying out even more.

Super Creative Graffiti Wall-art Animation

Amazing the creativity that some people have. This is mind-boggling.
» MUTO a wall-painted animation by BLU

homemade

homemade, originally uploaded by calvo.

My dear friend and fellow goofball Calvo made this and took the pretty picture. I'm inspired AND I have a half-a-ton of carrots from the Miss KB. So, I'm going to try to make this. You can too. Click the photo -- the recipe is there.

Bonus: Calvo is coming to visit me and 7s in mid-ish/late-ish August. He's got a regatta in Long Beach and I convinced him to travel north for a couple of days. Fun! His fifth trip visiting. Who says Internet friends aren't real friends? :)

Calvo and I met ten years ago through Ye Ol' Listserv (not it's real name). I've made some pretty great friends through that list. Thanks Dave Siegel.

Tom Sellack Birthday Cake

Is awesome.

a keyhole garden

a keyhole garden, originally uploaded by a.sheu.

Today, a friend sent a link about Keyhole Gardens, a type of raised-bed garden that protects soil and creates a bigger crop for difficult growing areas. I think this is one of the greatest ideas ever.

They are teaching this type of gardening to the people in Lesotho, but I think it would be a great type of garden to have here in California: easy to maintain, easy to plant, easy to harvest.

I found the above photo on Flickr. You can also see this harvest-ready garden also on Flickr. Or visit the Save a Cow web site. It has more photos and instructions. Or see the AfriGadget web site for more photos and information.

July 4th Campers

July 4th Campers, originally uploaded by 7-how-7.

We had a perfect Fourth of July. It was one of those dreamy, pinch-me so perfect lazy days. It was the kind of day that you day dream of in the middle of winter. It was heaven on a hillside.

Flickr Set: Lotuses of Echo Park

Speekina lotuses, I put together a set of lotus photos I took from Echo Park in 2006. Check 'em out .

www.flickr.com