originally uploaded by JanV.

I remember when Pope Paul VI died. In my eleven-year-old brain it seemed as if he had been Pope for a very long time. I've kept that sense, never bothering to go back and check it until today. Pope Paul VI was Pope from 1963 until 1978. Fifteen years, hardly a lifetime to me anymore. Yet at the time, fiften years was much longer than I had been alive. It might have well been decades. Anything past eleven seemed quite long indeed.

Then there was Pope John Paul I. Only he wasn't the first then, because he was the only one. But he died shortly after. This also made an impression on me: one Pope for seemingly a lifetime and the next Pope only lasts months? It seemed like a hiccup in the rhythms of the papacy.

And yet, who could hope to be Pope longer than Pope Paul VI?

Well, a dark horse from Poland, that is who. I didn't understand it at the time, the controversy, the intense interest in a spiritual man from Poland. So, he's from Poland, I thought in my little-girl head. Why are they so upset?

They appointed a Polish Pope and now, looking back... I wonder how that transition was? Difficult? Tumultuous? Feathers ruffled? Tall hats askewed? A dull longing to rebel against this forced authority?

So the Pope is nearing the end of his days. People pray for his life to be extended, but I think that is selfish. His quality of life is not so good now. Surely it would be more meaningful for him, a spiritual man, to pass through the unknown into the arms of his Father.

It is hard to imagine a life with a new Pope. A different Pope. And it is easy for the faithful to cling to their beloved pater, as well. It is human nature, I think.

Pope Paul VI — he who seemed to reign a million lifetimes to me, served for fifteen years. Pope John Paul II, the second-choice Pope from Poland, pinch hitting for John Paul I, held his seat for almost twenty-seven years, practically twice the length as PPVI. And it is amazing when you think of the world transformations that evolved during this time: the fall of communism, most notably the top-most thing, as he came from Poland. Aids. And an ever-rising voice of the fundamental believers of several religions.

I'm not Catholic and don't necessarily follow the news from Rome. I couldn't tell you if Pope John Paul II was a good pope or a bad pope. I couldn't expound upon his impact or his legacy. Yet, my heart goes out to him and the millions of his faithful believers, in their time of passing and shifting and evolving and changing. Times that are always tough and sad.